Expired!

My cell phone rang at work today--something that rarely happens anymore now that I am not a caregiver any longer. The compassionate voice on the other end identified herself as the hospice worker who had done the initial intake on Auntie L of the Slippery Pants. She said she was calling because she noticed that Auntie L had EXPIRED! (She seemed surprised by this--something I though odd for a hospice worker!?!)

Now, my ALOTSP was a lot of things, but she was NOT expired. She had hardly gone past her "best if used by" date!

I was speechless--Auntie L had died! She was elderly, things didn't work like they used to, she was in endstage COPD and hospiced, she was ready---we did not need euphemisms! Auntie L is dead, and it is o.k. with both she and I--we discussed it at length prior to the event.

As I was busy "processing" the expired concept, the hospice lady prattled on about how amazing she thought Auntie L was--I already knew that far better than she! Perhaps I have backed up to Keebler-Ross anger stage--but I don't think so. Maybe I am just too sensitive--perhaps she was trying to be comforting. It wasn't working.

I was brought back to the conversation with a slightly louder "are you o.k.?" I must have missed a response, although I think I was uttering appropriately placed "aa-uha"s. Was I o.k.? Of course I am o.k., I just wasn't ready to get a condolence call about my expired ALOTSP.

In the hospice lady's defense, I think she was trying to help--I thanked her for her assistance and perhaps a little to quickly, ended our conversation.

ALOTSP was not like a gallon of milk or yogurt after all. She was not sour or curdled, even in the final moments. She was a sweetie!! I want to remember her that way.

I think people should stick to "I am sorry for your loss".