I can't hear you...Or ....la, la,la, la, la,la,la,la(with thumbs in his ears)

And here is how the conversation went:

Dr.: Are you employed?

2 days Post knee surgery patient: Yes

What do you do?

Sales

Travel?

Yes. Scheduled for Germany in two weeks. Mexico, and Germany usually.

None of that for at least 6 weeks. Very high risk of blood clots on airplanes!

I thought I would go into the office tomorrow or Monday

Do you have a couch in your office?

no

Can you keep your knee and ankle above your heart---like on a bed or something?

No

Well, that will not work. The risk of blood clots is very high post-surgery!

I suppose I could not go in until Tuesday

And the swelling will impede the healing. Your leg should be elevated.

I have a chair

And there is infection. But the biggest risk is blood clots and swelling.

O.k., then I can work from home until Thursday.

We do not need complications at this point. You need to stay home for at least two weeks. You will use these crutches for at lease six weeks. No weight for two weeks.

I can go in Thurs or Friday.

You can't drive with the pain killers you are taking.

I only took one this morning, but it hurts now.

So no work, no weight on that leg for two weeks. Call physical therapy for an apt. You need to keep that elevated except when you get up to use the bathroom.

I suppose I can work from home and go in Friday.

You are to keep that leg elevated above your heart. And on ice--both the machine and real ice. We will take the stitches out in 10 days, then we can talk about going back to work.

My computer isn't fixed. That will be a problem.

So, see you in 10 days. Rest, elevate, pain killers, ice, home exercises, physical therapy. Any questions?
No.

Walking out of the building:
I have to go into the office.
Wife: In two weeks. Apt for stitches removal is the 7th. You can tell them the 8th.
I can't be gone that long.
???

He didn't hear a word they said that did not agree with his ideas!

Of course, he barely made it home, and collapsed, unconscious, for several hours, so we won't fight the office battle today.

So the people at his office should thank me, as the last thing they need is a drugged invalid in their way....And all the commuters who made it home safely....And the insurance company should thank me too, as I could be a rich widow, unless of course they rule the death by blood clot a suicide!